I had a different purpose in mind when I agreed to go with my friend on her trip at the other end of the country. I could have had gone on to CamSur where I could have joined the National Volunteers’ Summit but in my heart I wanted to go somewhere else where none would possibly remind me of things that were long buried in the past. I was thinking maybe now that I’ve finally graduated, I could stop wondering and wander off to places I’ve been longing, away from the cages of my comfort zone and the memories I’ve built that surrounded me for so long. I wanted to get away from all of it. Something new, something fresh — that was the plan.
I’ve tried and I could say I’ve failed but I would never regret that I’ve failed. That I’ve held back, giving way to what I really wanted in the first place. What I’ve been wanting for the last years. Maybe I failed on trying, but it lead me to something great, greater than what I am trying to achieve. Waaaaay better.
“Many are the plans in a Man’s heart but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.” (Proverbs 19:21)
I have had that scripture lingering around believing that it will eventually be clear to me, what it means to me. Maybe I am too overwhelmed with how the turn of the events quickly unfolded. Or probably it had been waiting for me for the longest time. Maybe, possibly. I feel so blessed and I’ll be forever grateful to You, my God. Not just for me but also for the people around me, for the people I love and every person that I would come in contact to. It will fall exactly right into the place where you intended us to be, and be the person you want us to be. For Your glory and for every person that would be affected by our very existence. I may and I’d probably go through phases of doubts and idleness, of remorse and hatred but it will be Your Love that I would always hold on to and the only thing that will ever save me from the insanity that our minds would create.
“He’s going to tame your doubt and fulfill that dream in your heart.” (Psalms 37:4)
In Jesus name, Amen.